A nasty infection had been troubling
me for the past two weeks and as it healed I couldnot help but draw parallel
between that pustulant, virulent wound and difficult situations- how both of
them manifest and progress and need to be dealt with.
The beginning- It
started with a small reddish bump, which I conveniently ignored. Telling myself-
oh its nothing, maybe an insect bite, could be a heat boil… anything to prevent me from addressing the
issue.
Progress- That
little boil suppurated, festered into a sizable abscess. I allowed it to
fester, to suppurate still convincing myself that it will heal on its own. But
the truth is inwardly I was afraid of the scalpel, or the tests that I might
have to undergo. What if it turned out to be something more serious than it appears? Ignorance is bliss and in the process I
allowed it to grow further. Silly excuses like-“I will get it checked after
the holiday”, “don’t want anything to ruin my birthday”. Just like we all do, visualizing a pleasant future to ward off
the pain of today.
Pain- That abscess
soon took over my life. I could not run/jog or do my yogasanas. Every small
movement translated into deep pain.I could not sleep, the nights were spent
tossing and turning trying to get in a comfortable position. Had to wear
clothes that hid the red spot- just like
we mask, put on makeup ,dress up at times to hide the fact that in reality we
are breaking up inside. The worst was not being able to hug anybody and no
I don’t mean those A –line formal ones. I am talking about those tight embraces
with my loved ones.There was not a single moment that was easy.
The bleeding- and
then one fine day I took the scalpel and dealt with it.No longer inclined to bearing
and keeping up with the pain. Before you attempt to something similar in
physical discomfort, let me remind you I am a doctor and well versed with this
procedure. Things took their turn with the last flow of clean blood from the
wound even the pain and discomfort went away. It bled on and off for some time but didn’t matter at all because I
was so happy to get it off my chest- literally.
We all know how to
deal with adversity and pain, we can sense the onset of pain but ignore,
procrastinate avoid dealing with it. We keep up false appearances , tolerating misbehavior
of people who inwardly we know aren’t good for us- all in the hope that things
will change in the unseen future. But instead of living with it, it’s better to
cut open the wound- let it bleed and be cured once and for all. If the wound
has already become too big, we may even die in the process. But isn’t that
better than dying a hundred deaths everyday!
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